Daring Greatly by Brené Brown.
Not so much a book review as an attempt to sort out my thoughts about it. There is so much good in this book.
Yet, I kept feeling that it's only a part of the puzzle, and some
pieces are missing.
Then I got it. Of course, Brown is not
writing a "Christian book" - she's addressing people of all
faiths and worldviews, so that everyone can apply the principles to
their own lives.
And I need to do just that. "Fill
in the blanks" with my own convictions, and work out how the
good stuff in her book is applicable to my life. Because I
do, of course, recognize the patterns of shame in my life, the ways I am hiding
my vulnerability.
And as I kept thinking about this, I
realized: I've been learning about "daring greatly", as
Brown defines it, all along my faith journey: from the Bible, from
good Bible teachers, from the conviction of Holy Spirit.
I can't hide behind a facade of good
deeds, "perfection" and people-pleasing. I am a sinner in
need of God's love and grace. And it's only by God's love and grace
that I can have the strength and courage to actually embrace
vulnerability and keep living it consistently. Jesus is the "enough" for me.
The love and grace of Jesus are the missing
puzzle pieces in daring greatly.
And as far as these have been present in my
life, something has been happening. By the grace of God, I am no
longer the same nervous people-pleaser that I was fifteen, twenty years ago. I think and act
differently. God has made great progress in healing me, even if I'm
still far from full "whole-heartedness". I can't take the
credit for my maturity. Or whatever vulnerability I have been able to
put into practice. And I admit there is still a long way to go. I
keep needing God's grace.
Books like this are a help along the
way, because they prompt me to ask myself the right kinds of
questions. My heart beat faster when I got to the chapter on
parenting and read the question:
"Are you the adult you want your
child to grow up to be?"
This is what I want to keep from this
book. Write it in big letters on the chalkboard of my soul. Keep
asking myself these questions, and asking God to help me grow into a
healthier direction.
Do I show respect to all the people I
meet? Do I show love, in all the love languages there are?
Do I give my child the sense that he is
valuable as a person? Do I model a healthy marriage relationship,
too?
Do I admit my mistakes, and ask for
forgiveness and make amends when appropriate?
Am I a person of integrity?
Am I ready to get out of my comfort
zone?
To try new things without being stopped
by fear of failure? And to put effort into doing things, into
learning, growing, developing - even though it's not easy and I'm not
instantly good?
Do I use my talents in a positive, fruitful way;
set goals and work hard to reach them?
Am I worried about what other people
think of me, trying to perform to expectations, and easily ashamed?
Or do I let other people see me as I
am, do I put my real self and real thoughts out there, do I take the
risk of being rejected?
Is my faith important to me, in deeds
as well as in words?
Am I passionate about loving and
following Jesus?
Do I pray, praise God, and read the Bible
regularly, every day, not because I'm fulfilling a duty and trying to
'please' God, but because I truly believe that my relationship with
God is the core and foundation of my life?
I know which questions I want to answer
with "Yes" - what sort of person I want to be - and how I
want my son to be. Whatever our talents, interests, temperaments,
personalities.
And when we fail? Grace.
And when we succeed? All the more to
the glory of God.
Thanks for the book, Brené Brown.
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